We hear a lot about over coming our limiting beliefs, but what exactly are limiting beliefs? Before my coaching journey, I’d thought of my fears as just some primal instinct, that I could rationalize and push through, since that’s what I’ve done all of these years anyways.
As I came upon my last mentor coaching session, where I would be evaluated to see if I was up to par on my skills to take the oral exam, I found myself terrified! I have this logical side of me, and that inner voice was like, “What am I so afraid of? I’ve been coaching for over a year now, and saw how my clients really got results.” But yet the fear was still in me. In taking on this exam, I wanted to be totally authentic in my skill as a coach, and not just acting like a coach, but really integrating coaching skills to my view of the world and how I interact with others on a daily basis.
The first thing I did was to allow the flood of fear to rush forward, and to allow all the negative, scared voices to speak. My logical mind listened for clues. I found that my fear stemmed from a childhood belief. I survived my early years of my life, by saying exactly what my father wanted to hear. I learned to read him, and know what he was fishing for, and I gave it to him. Whenever I’d try to express my fears, or other feelings, he’d tell me that no one wanted to know how I felt, no one cares. I would hide my face in my pillow and ball my eyes out. This way of interacting with others became my pattern and stayed with me for a long time.
Secondly, once I realized that and allowed the pain to release out of me, that means crying and writing for me. Then I created an affirmation to counter that belief, “People do want to hear what I have to say, and they do care.” I say this to myself every morning when I wake up and I just lay in bed and say this positive words and allow a feeling of ease to flow through me.
Lastly, I notice when, I want to say something but hesitate, and I realize people might want to or need to hear what I have to say, and that it could be a gift for them. And so, I courageously speak from my heart as a gift that can be received or respectfully declined.
And so, if you are struggling with fears and limiting beliefs, take a deep breath and release…. I invite you to allow those feelings to flow, listen with compassion to you inner voices, and create a positive practice for yourself, whether it be writing, affirmations, yoga, running, painting, etc.
Gift yourself with compassion and see how the benefits ripple out through your beautiful soul!