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Ever feel like you’re out of place?

“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” ~ Anais Nin

Sitting at the stop light, waiting for the light to turn green on my way to a job that is less than inspiring, feeling stressed thinking about the day ahead, I see this weed growing out of the concrete sidewalk in the middle of nowhere.

I find myself identifying… with this weed..that I see.

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At times I feel like a weed, an outsider, growing and struggling to survive in a place that is… less than nurturing and less than optimal conditions for me, to thrive in MY own natural ways.. (Maybe that’s why I’m short! Lol)

At times I feel like a weed, growing wildly, so fast, and some seeing my value as useless. Yet, somehow I bring life, oxygen, tenderness, and warmth to a place that is rigid, hard, and cold.

At times I feel like a weed, living….No, SURVIVING! Growing out of the earth, through an environment that is so less than optimal for a young girl. Yet, I survive. I survive the struggle, the toxic pollution, the uncaring passerbys , as I choke and gasp for air, for a reason , for a purpose to live.

Years of life as weed,

growing and flourishing,

I transform into a blooming flower.

with-love-1315347-1279x852All my years
I saw myself as a weed
Growing wildly among strangers
I was a budding flower!
Waiting to reveal my truth
to open my petals
and Blossom

~Stacy Feliciano

 

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Why do people lie?

I often asked myself, “Why do  people lie?”  That question has also made me check myself, “Do I lie?”  If I don’t follow through on commitments to myself, yes, that’s a lie to me!  If I’m always putting myself last on the list of priorities, yes, that’s another lie!  So that made me look deeper into what is really a lie and what is really the truth.
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There is no such thing as TRUTH outside of you, TRUTH lies only with yourself.

Everything outside of us is only a mere perception, perception based on our own senses, and our own life condition at that time, and can be misconstrued as the other person’s truth.  ~That becomes the ILLUSION, aka a LIE.~

How can we live in truth?

 Create a practice of self acceptance, not judging and criticizing, but truly accepting what you do, say, how you look, mistakes, LOVE AND ACCEPT EVERY SINGLE PART OF YOUR LIFE.  This takes careful observation of your internal voice and how it makes you feel.

It’s NOT ok to judge yourself because the truth lies deep within your CORE, and by accepting who you are, and how you show up in life, you can truly be able to see yourself in full truth.

This is nourishment for you soul.

 

 

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What’s the BIG idea about “boundaries”?

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Having boundaries has become such a buzz nowadays. Some people love boundaries while others believe that it’s not necessary. Thinking about having boundaries can seem, well, uncaring and selfish.

Many articles talk about having healthy boundaries, and to stand up for yourself. If this brings on anxiety, or thoughts that this will make you become unavailable, unsympathetic, and just not caring, then keep reading.

What if boundaries meant that you were honoring someone else’s mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual energy? That by respecting someone else’s thoughts, feelings, space, and beliefs, you have created a golden boundary, built of deep love and respect.

When we embrace the fact that everyone is unique, yet, we are all on this journey together, boundaries naturally arise from a deep source. That source moves through you and nurtures, nourishes and supports the other person’s state being.

So the BIG idea is… boundaries supports us to create deep, meaningful relationships through embracing individuality on all levels, with respect that nourishes our life condition and the vibration we send out into the world.
~from my heart to yours

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Don’t let people talk you out of your happiness.

Love this post! We spend our adulthood peeling off the layers of labels from others that become our own voices. Let’s all support each other to be free to just BE our authentic selves!

Thriving Under Pressure

I love you just the way you are.

If you are lucky enough to find joy in the course of a day.. keep it to yourself..

At least until you find the courage to radiate, illuminate, and enjoy your life.

No matter how. No matter when.

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Skip through the streets. Watch netflix on repeat. Eat kraft dinner. Swing in the park. Start a blog!

Whatever it is that makes you smile, makes you giggle, makes you dance in the streets.

Whatever it is that makes you levitate, makes you beam, makes your heart skip a beat.

Don’t let people talk you out of your happiness.

The world needs your joy. The universe needs your light.

It is time to silence the happiness critics in your life.

At least in your mind. Forever in your heart.

We all need your unique, quirky brand of happiness.

Now. More than ever. Be brave…

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Was it really MY fault?

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It’s amazing when I realize how much there’s to learn about myself.  I mean the hidden thoughts and feelings that’s been buried deep in my subconscious mind.  And what’s kinda magical is HOW I learn these things.

For example, a couple of weeks ago I was driving down my street on my way to work, and something caught my eye on the left side of the street and didn’t see the police officer standing on the right side of the road with a speed gun.  So, by the time I saw him, it was too late, he was waving me over to pull on the side of the road.  As I pulled over, and reached for my purse to get my ID out, and get this done as fast as possible. I saw an elderly woman walk out, and start to talk to the officer.  Of course, in my head I was like “Oh my gosh lady, please, I got to get to work!”

The officer finally came to my car, and his first words were, “This is your lucky day!”  I was so baffled, I didn’t know if he was being sarcastically mean or what.  He said the lady came out to ask for help because her husband just fell.  I literally gasped out loud, worried for the old guy.  Then the officer sent me on my way.

As I drove away I felt a bit lucky, then got a big surge of GUILT.  Thoughts of blaming myself for what happened to the old guy.  Was some higher power watching out for me and made the old guy fall?  Do I have some kind of protective energy that caused that to happen to save myself?  and on, and on….  THEN I caught myself, how can this be my fault?  I had no power in the elderly mans fall, NONE AT ALL.  I was just feeling guilty that I got something beneficial from someone else’s pain.  Why was I blaming myself?

I finally realized that this was an old pattern in my thinking, creating my own stories making me the OH SO POWERFUL ONE.  These stories were what I told myself to survive my life.  I have to support, help, serve others because I am the strong oneHow will you ripple out?. Bulls**t.

I am strong within my own power and the action that I choose to take. Everything before that is what brought me to this moment, and everything after that, is the effect from that action.

So, the action that we take everyday has a relationship from the past, and leads us into the future. Our present moment is the most important factor, and not just our actions, but our  life condition and vibration that gives birth to our actions.  Whether we act from a place of hurt, anger, exhaustion, abundance, love, or gratitude, THAT energy is what creates the cause to our next action and thus the benefits or consequences we receive.  Our energy, or actions ripple out through vibrations.

Can we stop blaming ourselves and other people?  Can we instead, accept the things that happen is from  the relationship of the past, present, and future?  Let’s be the change we want to create!  We can do this one step at a time.

 

 

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Is a belief only true because you believe it so?

Our beliefs are powerful. Many of them stem from childhood, a time when we have limited experiences and maturity. Here is a woman empowering herself through connection to her inner wisdom and creating a truer belief for herself and transforming her life with courage and determination!

Hope Vs Headaches

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After spending a lot of time recently pondering about our beliefs and how they form our life and our world, I stumbled across this quote which left me intrigued to delve deeper into the subject. Gandhi has hit the nail on the head with this one!  Until recent months, in which I have nearly read all of Dr Joe Dispenza’s books, I had never really examined what beliefs I held and how they were affecting my world. As Gandhi explains, the beliefs you hold only go on to affect your actions, which then become your habits which ultimately become your destiny! All through a silly little belief that may or may not be true anymore? After all, how are beliefs formed in the first place? Through our thoughts? If so then maybe we should be more aware of what we are thinking from day to day? Maybe it’s time we all…

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A Practice to Overcoming Fear

We hear a lot about over coming our limiting beliefs, but what exactly are limiting beliefs?  Before my coaching journey, I’d thought of my fears as just some primal instinct, that I could rationalize and push through, since that’s what I’ve done all of these years anyways.
As I came upon my last mentor coaching session, where I would be evaluated to see if I was up to par on my skills to take the oral exam, I found myself terrified! I have this logical side of me, and that inner voice was like, “What am I so afraid of?  I’ve been coaching for over a year now, and saw how my clients really got results.”  But yet the fear was still in me.  In taking on this exam, I wanted to be totally authentic in my skill as a coach, and not just acting like a coach, but really integrating coaching skills to my view of the world and how I interact with others on a daily basis.
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Finding the LIGHT at the end of fear.
The first thing I did was to allow the flood of fear to rush forward, and to allow all the negative, scared voices to speak. My logical mind listened for clues.  I found that  my fear stemmed from a childhood belief.  I survived my early years of my life, by saying exactly what my father wanted to hear.  I learned to read him, and know what he was fishing for, and I gave it to him.  Whenever I’d try to express my fears, or other feelings, he’d tell me that  no one wanted to know how I felt, no one cares.  I would hide my face in my pillow and ball my eyes out.  This way of interacting with others became my pattern and stayed with me for a long time.
Secondly, once I realized that and allowed the pain to release out of me, that means crying and writing for me.  Then I created an affirmation to counter that belief, “People do want to hear what I have to say, and they do care.”  I say this to myself every morning when I wake up and I just lay in bed and say this positive words and allow a feeling of ease to flow through me.
Lastly, I notice when, I want to say something but hesitate, and I realize people might want to or need to hear what I have to say, and that it could be a gift for them.  And so, I courageously speak from my heart as a gift that can be received or respectfully declined.
And so, if you are struggling with fears and limiting beliefs, take a deep breath and release….  I invite you to allow those feelings to flow, listen with compassion to you inner voices, and create a positive practice for yourself, whether it be writing, affirmations, yoga, running, painting, etc.
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Gift yourself with compassion and see how the benefits ripple out through your beautiful soul!
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No Pain, No Gain – Find Peace in Your World

     The suffering and disharmony we see manifesting in our world, is a reflection of our  own environment. Our surroundings and how we perceive it, is created from our minds and our energy, our life force.  It’s so much easier to blame the “others”, but that only creates more internal turmoil.
     Maybe we don’t blame anyone, and accept that it’s just the way it is? And we just begin to create changes in our own lives, to be that one ripple outward?
     We can creating changes through embodying peace and harmony within our core inner self.  As the core of our own world, we radiate our soul energy outward and let it flow, peacefully and naturally.
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     Peace and harmony are at the core of your life force and your state of being.  
I’ve been told many times, by many people that world peace will NEVER happen.  Logically, at one layer this could be true, however, looking at it from another perspective, on another layer it is reality.
     Peace and harmony in our world is not a ludicrous idea.  
Somehow, sometime in our past we became to believe that reaching a state of being, whether it be peace, enlightenment, egolessness, etc. , is an achievement, a destination that we arrive at and then everything falls into place.
     Arriving at a state of being might just mean manifesting that life condition, at that moment.  It’s a consistent practice that we reach through experiencing pain and joy, and everything in between, through our learning, our own enlightenment.
     I invite you to remember a time when you experienced a state of being at peace, or had an “Aha ” moment.  It was great, it uplifted you and you felt lightness and expansion, and probably a sense of freedom… and then what happened? 
 
      It eventually floated away.
Manifesting a state of being is a consistent practice
…of concious action
…of having a seeking spirit
…with courage and determination.  
     To continue to have such perseverance, we need motivation.
     Pain, conflict, obstacles can be shifted to motivation… the thing that makes you want to change, gain a different perspective, and do anything to make it all better.  Aligning all parts of ourselves, our minds, body, and soul, which bring a sense of peace and freedom.
     There will always be dark energy that contracts us, and light energy that expands us, as it’s as necessary, as the contraction and expansion of every breath into our bodies.
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Gaining Confidence: Are achievements a good source of confidence?

FullSizeRender 15Here I am struggling with confidence in passing my oral assessment for the PCC level coaching certification.  I’ve worked hard for over a year on my training, practice, integration, and continuous growth on this, not to mention the past 40 something years of experience that brought me to this point of my life.  I’ve always felt in the past, that I wasn’t lacking in confidence, not that I exude confidence in everything I do, it’s just I’ve always just been able to have the courage to move forward to what I wanted to achieve in my life.  But this one is a big one.  I REALLY am passionate, in my heart, to achieve this level of proficiency of coaching.
So here I am pondering my confidence… as I do so, I think about what is really undermining my confidence?  I realize it’s my expectation of what I want the most, to succeed and accomplish my goal. And if I don’t meet my expectation…then…what?
This is THE most crucial part, the part when you fill in the blanks.  These are some of my “fill in the blanks”… If I don’t succeed then…I’m a failure, then I suck, then I’m not good enough, and on and on…the negative self talk.  I realize, this is what causes fear, anxiety, and lack of confidence.
You see… the outcome, success or failure, only tells us what worked well, and what we could do better.  It doesn’t provide the value of who we really are.
INSTEAD of focusing on the outcome, focus on the real work, the process that got you to where you are.
Before getting to that point of success or failure, there was the beginning of that journey, the decision to take on that new project, goal, passion, to take on that new endeavor.  That’s where your courage revealed itself.
As you moved along that journey, your effort, determination, perseverance, passion, courage, creativity, etc. drove you to keep moving toward your vision.  Now don’t you think that’s a more accurate measure of success?!
Imagine a baby learning to walk… does the baby think, I suck at walking,I can’t do this?  NO.  The baby will instinctually get back up and try and try again.
Somewhere along our lives, we learn to bad talk ourselves, and listen to that fearful voice, instead of following our instincts to get back up and keep at it.
As we learn to step into our power, our soul power, that keeps us moving toward our goals, we can’t help but exercise our power from our true value.  Our essence of who we are, manifests into our powerful energy that moves us toward our passions.  The more we move forward, the more we focus on our power, the more we are able to see who we truly are, and that is the source of confidence.
I invite you to reflect on your journey. Reveal the values you live from, and awaken your consciousness and confidence to your truth.
I would love to hear what values you might gain confidence from! ❤
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What is a life coach?

A life coach is a partner, in creating the experience that is valuable for you, to attain your goals, passions, and to empower you.  A life coach doesn’t coach you like a sport coach.  A life coach creates a space for open conversation, and inquiry into your inner wisdom, knowledge, and ideas.

In a solution focused framework,  you can manifest what you already know into an embodied experience and action plan to achieve your goals and vision for your life, creating a sense of peace.

A life coach is skilled in creating the framework for the conversation, for you to envision what you desire, to discover why it’s really important to you, to know when you achieve it, and to create manageable actions steps toward your desires and goals.

The conversation is guided by you the client.  Why?  Because of these 5 Ericksonian principles only you know yourself the best:

  1. YOU are OK – everyone is ok as they are.  Meaning that where ever you are on your journey in life, it is exactly where you are meant to be.  Why?  Because that is where you are, by the choices that you’ve made in the past.
  2. YOU has a positive intention – in exploring to the deeper meaning of our intentions, going beyond the the surface, beneath the layers you will find that there is always a positive intention for a your actions.
  3. YOU make the best choice that is available to them – believing that each individual, when given the opportunity, can and will make the best choices for themselves at that time.  You know yourself the best, as you are unique.
  4. YOU have all the resources you need – belief that you do have an inner wisdom, knowledge, intuition, experience to create solutions to attaining your desires.
  5. Change is inevitable – we’re changing every moment in our lives, regardless if we do nothing or we’re busy as heck.  You can’t ever go back to the last hour, minute, or even seconds that has passed.  So, no matter what you do, or don’t do, things will change with time.

Words have power and energy, and saying your ideas out loud has a powerful effect on your heart and soul, which helps you to awaken to your most deepest values.  Values that make you feel passionate and full of purpose and excited to get out of bed in the morning!

Most life coaches have a gift Life coaches serve you to live your most inspired and empowered life.

See what Google CEO says about coaching here.

GET COACHED!