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Ever feel like you’re out of place?

“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” ~ Anais Nin

Sitting at the stop light, waiting for the light to turn green on my way to a job that is less than inspiring, feeling stressed thinking about the day ahead, I see this weed growing out of the concrete sidewalk in the middle of nowhere.

I find myself identifying… with this weed..that I see.

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At times I feel like a weed, an outsider, growing and struggling to survive in a place that is… less than nurturing and less than optimal conditions for me, to thrive in MY own natural ways.. (Maybe that’s why I’m short! Lol)

At times I feel like a weed, growing wildly, so fast, and some seeing my value as useless. Yet, somehow I bring life, oxygen, tenderness, and warmth to a place that is rigid, hard, and cold.

At times I feel like a weed, living….No, SURVIVING! Growing out of the earth, through an environment that is so less than optimal for a young girl. Yet, I survive. I survive the struggle, the toxic pollution, the uncaring passerbys , as I choke and gasp for air, for a reason , for a purpose to live.

Years of life as weed,

growing and flourishing,

I transform into a blooming flower.

with-love-1315347-1279x852All my years
I saw myself as a weed
Growing wildly among strangers
I was a budding flower!
Waiting to reveal my truth
to open my petals
and Blossom

~Stacy Feliciano

 

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What’s the BIG idea about “boundaries”?

natural-boundaries

Having boundaries has become such a buzz nowadays. Some people love boundaries while others believe that it’s not necessary. Thinking about having boundaries can seem, well, uncaring and selfish.

Many articles talk about having healthy boundaries, and to stand up for yourself. If this brings on anxiety, or thoughts that this will make you become unavailable, unsympathetic, and just not caring, then keep reading.

What if boundaries meant that you were honoring someone else’s mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual energy? That by respecting someone else’s thoughts, feelings, space, and beliefs, you have created a golden boundary, built of deep love and respect.

When we embrace the fact that everyone is unique, yet, we are all on this journey together, boundaries naturally arise from a deep source. That source moves through you and nurtures, nourishes and supports the other person’s state being.

So the BIG idea is… boundaries supports us to create deep, meaningful relationships through embracing individuality on all levels, with respect that nourishes our life condition and the vibration we send out into the world.
~from my heart to yours

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Gaining Confidence: Are achievements a good source of confidence?

FullSizeRender 15Here I am struggling with confidence in passing my oral assessment for the PCC level coaching certification.  I’ve worked hard for over a year on my training, practice, integration, and continuous growth on this, not to mention the past 40 something years of experience that brought me to this point of my life.  I’ve always felt in the past, that I wasn’t lacking in confidence, not that I exude confidence in everything I do, it’s just I’ve always just been able to have the courage to move forward to what I wanted to achieve in my life.  But this one is a big one.  I REALLY am passionate, in my heart, to achieve this level of proficiency of coaching.
So here I am pondering my confidence… as I do so, I think about what is really undermining my confidence?  I realize it’s my expectation of what I want the most, to succeed and accomplish my goal. And if I don’t meet my expectation…then…what?
This is THE most crucial part, the part when you fill in the blanks.  These are some of my “fill in the blanks”… If I don’t succeed then…I’m a failure, then I suck, then I’m not good enough, and on and on…the negative self talk.  I realize, this is what causes fear, anxiety, and lack of confidence.
You see… the outcome, success or failure, only tells us what worked well, and what we could do better.  It doesn’t provide the value of who we really are.
INSTEAD of focusing on the outcome, focus on the real work, the process that got you to where you are.
Before getting to that point of success or failure, there was the beginning of that journey, the decision to take on that new project, goal, passion, to take on that new endeavor.  That’s where your courage revealed itself.
As you moved along that journey, your effort, determination, perseverance, passion, courage, creativity, etc. drove you to keep moving toward your vision.  Now don’t you think that’s a more accurate measure of success?!
Imagine a baby learning to walk… does the baby think, I suck at walking,I can’t do this?  NO.  The baby will instinctually get back up and try and try again.
Somewhere along our lives, we learn to bad talk ourselves, and listen to that fearful voice, instead of following our instincts to get back up and keep at it.
As we learn to step into our power, our soul power, that keeps us moving toward our goals, we can’t help but exercise our power from our true value.  Our essence of who we are, manifests into our powerful energy that moves us toward our passions.  The more we move forward, the more we focus on our power, the more we are able to see who we truly are, and that is the source of confidence.
I invite you to reflect on your journey. Reveal the values you live from, and awaken your consciousness and confidence to your truth.
I would love to hear what values you might gain confidence from! ❤
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Stop the Blame Game, Step into Your power

It’s so easy to blame someone else for everything.

I’ve blamed the car that cut me off for getting me upset.  I’ve blamed the rude, inconsiderate customer for making me feel defensive, or my kids for making me feel frustrated because they haven’t taken out the trash or did their homework, or put away their dishes, for the upteenth time! I’ve blamed my husband for not being considerate enough, for being too agreeable, for not understanding me, for not feeling connected.  If you’re like me, that sounds so spot on your life too.

And it goes the other way too…

You’ve been blamed for not caring enough, for not understanding, for not knowing or doing what you “should” have done, etc.

BUT, the worst blame is the one that comes from your own voice.

Our own expectations of how we believe we should and shouldn’t be creates black and white thinking.  This OR that, us OR them, you get the picture.  It starts a snowball of negative thoughts and separation and competition.  Here is where we begin to give our power away.  We allow our emotional energy to be determined by what they are doing, thinking, saying about us.

Making other people’s behavior about you is giving away your power.

We have no control over other people, when we let what they do and say control how we act, we’re allowing those people to control us.  Honoring our own power, or as I like to call it our SOULight is our freedom from this madness.  It’s not control, it’s faith.  For me faith is in the law of causality, the law of cause and effect.  Whatever your faith is, you must have undeniable faith, and allow your mind to release everything, and your heart to feel everything, and LET GO…

Mind you, this does take practice.  And it’s not an easy one at that!  My first gut reaction was, WHAT?  You want me to not have any expectations, how could I live, or get anything done?  I’m not saying to give up your goals or visions, or responsibilities.

I’m just saying, consider GIVING IN to the process.  HONOR that you are on the journey, and continuing on the path that unfolds.

Right now, if you feel it’s right, pause and take a deep breath here, several times, and release….

Our breath can help us create the sensitivity to feel the energy that’s within our bodies, and our souls.  That light, beautiful feeling is our power.  Our power of life, gentleness, compassion, humility, wisdom, and love.

Step into your power of SOULight.  Feel it radiate from your very soul, throughout your body, and out toward all life, and everything that is, in the world.  Let your heart expand, your mind soften, your belly release, your shoulder relax…

 

Respect and honor the SOULight of others, and step into your power, keep it with  you, and  radiate your SOULight as brightly as you can possibly beam.  Honor yourself, fully and completely, as uniquely imperfect human BEings.

BE with love and peace.